or how our merry lads at hame,
in britain's court kept up the game;
how royal george, the lord leuk o'er him!
was managing st. stephen's quorum;
if sleekit chatham will was livin,
or glaikit charlie got his nieve in;
how daddie burke the plea was cookin,
if warren hasting's neck was yeukin;
how cesses, stents, and fees were rax'd.
or if bare arses yet were tax'd;
the news o' princes, dukes, and earls,
pimps, sharpers, bawds, and opera-girls;
if that daft buckie, geordie wales,
was threshing still at hizzies' tails;
or if he was grown oughtlins douser,
and no a perfect kintra cooser:
a' this and mair i never heard of;
and, but for you, i might despair'd of.
so, gratefu', back your news i send you,
and pray a' gude things may attend you.
ellisland, monday morning, 1790.